Maneuvering Life and Motherhood with Twins Plus One
Author: Karie Herring
Karie Herring rambles of a former life in Phoenix, AZ while raising a teen and tween twins in their new home in Orlando, FL. She has been featured in AOL Money & Finance, Betty Confidential and Career School Now. She's a full-time technical writer, functional fitness athlete, overachieving wife and mom. She loves talking about maneuvering motherhood, womanhood, and her passion for essential oils and natural living.
Giveaways are now under some scrutiny thanks to my bit of research. Also if you would like to call my integrity, ethics, and standards into question I am all about it. I will personally share with you the IP, email, and original quality of my findings. I in NO WAY alter, doctor, Photoshop, or adjust anything I post unless the doctoring is to protect innocents such as underage minors, children, or those who fall under privacy laws.
Now, I mentioned how I would post criterion for giveaways, some tell-tale signs of fraudulent giveaway hosters or at the very least would place them in a particular negative light, and I feel I cannot post adequate information without gathering additional data. A good researcher pulls information from various sources.
So I am asking you to come here and link up the blogs you find are questionable. Then we can ALL review them, see what qualities they carry that would suggest they are honest, ethical, and legitimate. This is not a witch hunt. Let me make that VERY clear, this is about setting a level of ethics. While blogging is a bit like the wild, wild west and the right channels have yet to catch up to the wave of rampant vigilante activity, we have to resort to means within ourselves to set a standard of legitimate, ethical, honest operation. Feel free to link me up if you think I am in question, I would be happy to point you to my winner listings, even the listings when I was on Blogger and I was a blogspot address.
Again, link them up, let’s review them together, let’s discuss the matter at hand. Then we can post an in depth guide, suggestions, ideas, as to what bloggers can do to further promote TRUE ethical blogging and stop abusing their power of influence. Please, do not use this for giveaways to promote your blog, this is for informational purposes and to allow people to report bloggers in an anonymous fashion without retaliation on my blog. My blog is a SAFE environment.
**LINK REMOVED DUE TO ABUSE** (4/23/10)
If you have something you need addressed to myself or anyone else you need to grow a set of balls and handle it with them. I tried to be a resource but clearly people cannot be adults. Again, if you have a beef with me….own up or get the fuck off my blog.
When I was taking part in my CSA this last fall and winter my kids and I had a BLAST picking out all of our foods and figuring out what they were. Honestly I was not introduced to a lot of foods as a child. My mother is a very picky woman as for tastes in foods. She likes asparagus but we were never fed this wonderful delicacy, nor artichokes (which are a personal favorite with drawn butter and capers), nor any family of squash that I can recall offhand, and my list can go on.
But in our CSA basket we received fennel, and I searched for recipes that would be fabulous for my entire family. My search was a failure. So I resorted to the old melon above my shoulders and came up with this FABS meal that your kids, husband, and you will LOVE!
4-5 chicken breasts (boneless, skinless are preferred)
sea salt and fresh ground peppercorn (regular pepper is also fine)
fresh grated lemon zest (the rind of a lemon)
fennel bulb, sliced thinly (reserve stalks to be frozen or used later)
2 T olive oil (or butter)
1/4 c. chicken stock
1 t. corn starch
4 T herb seasoning (I like Frontier Coop, but you can use the Mrs. Dash equivalent)
Wash off chicken and pat try. Cut into bite size chunks, set aside. Mix together all dry spice ingredients, salt, pepper and herb seasoning in a bowl with the corn starch. Add chicken to dry spice mix making sure the chicken is dry to be coated well with the spices.
My blog is too much fun these days, talking about life with my kids, now my evolving career, and of course, the controversy that is a “mommy blogger” community. I have been extremely curious as to the feedback on my Sweepin’ For Traffic post, which the feedback appears positive…I think.
I saw tweets which made me giggle, that I am “jealous,” that I am a “hater,” or maybe worse, I turned my blind eye and dug my heels in like I always do and thought as I always have “Fuck ’em.” These people have no bearing on my life, they have never taken the opportunity to interact with me, know my blog, know me, and really they could get bus tossed, like I did to them and I could care less what happens to them. Why? Because I am not considered an influencer.
In fact, they could retaliate and notify ALL the people I work with and really, I could care less. I speak my mind, in an intelligent manner, and if I caught the eye of someone about their less than honorable behavior, GOOD! Because my post was never to call anyone specifically out, it was informational. If a blogger WAS called out, maybe he or she might have considered their actions before and the consequences would not be the juncture for which we have arrived at today.
Furthermore, my post was about acknowledging that these bloggers are suppose to be “brand ambassadors,” “brand influencers,” and if they are considered as such, would they not be held to a higher standard of operation and ethical consideration? Yes, I think so. As for the petty, and truly petty statement of me being a jealous hater who would receive her karma:
BRING IT!
I carry no jealousy. If someone has something that I like or I consider to be favorable, I work hard for it. No way do I back bite, lie, CHEAT, steal, or walk over ANYONE to get what I want or so desire in life. Why? Because I was raised with integrity; I was taught that anything of any value in life requires work, hard, back-breaking, elbow greasing work. I also could care less about the stats on my blog. I stated before my blog is like my old friend, someone I can turn to for voicing opinions, supported facts, and sharing common life experiences that may help someone not feel alone.
Also, if you want to read a great post about the power of influence among moms and how moms are the newest sell outs, who in my opinion wreak of Enron, Arthur Andersen, Halliburton, and my personal favorites Goldman Sachs and Washington Mutual; check out the post by Jessica Gottlieb and how moms are willing to pimp out a product that could aid and abet the premature death of their children. Moms are promoting products for the sake of being acknowledged for the brand, being an attachment per se, a pilot fish, a parasite for lack of a better word of what they do by supporting and promoting products they know nothing about, that they themselves would sell out to as I said for the sake of being attached to the name.
By no means am I riding any high horse, but I think that moms should really consider their power of influence, consider how your word on your blog, Twitter, Facebook, can really influence someone who may be on the fence, who may not know and trust ANOTHER MOM in their opinion and word on a product. I mean would you suggest a product to another mom that you did not COMPLETELY and fully trust? I know I have reviewed products that I am not a fan of…I clearly have stated so to allow other moms to make educated decisions. So moms, dads, folks, why would  you support, promote, and get involved with a brand you DO NOT fully trust, believe in? Is social media the new sell out program? Are influencer’s abusing their power for the sake of processed foods, a buck, for advantages? What are the gains?
Call me dumb…but I am not seeing a whole lot of positives among these influencer’s. Are bloggers turning more to being underpaid marketers just for the sake of being attached to the brand? What is the draw?
I sat here writing endlessly on how to broach this topic tactfully, tastefully, and with bold tenacity. Only to come out empty handed and having the audience of readers say, “huh?†So while no tact may exist I will pour out the information. Some of you may have read a wonderful article on ShePosts.com. I was rather skeptical of ShePosts thinking the site was to stir the pot, cause drama, get mommy bloggers riled, and I am happy to report I was wrong. I feel the authors provide fabulous unbiased, or with as little bias as possible, on important topics that affect the business of mommy blogging or blogging.
The article on ShePosts quickly touched on ethics and what bloggers can do about their ethics of giveaways on their blog.
My take… I loved it. I ENJOYED with my WHOLE HEART being the “anonymous†to out these “ethical†blog badge toting liars. I have proof of bloggers, LOTS of bloggers, agreeing to forge giveaways. Unfortunately too, I was the recipient of a forged giveaway and found out months after the fact. This DID NOT sit well with me. The idea did not sit well with me, the knowledge I had, that bloggers think this sort of behavior is perfectly acceptable stirred a FIRE in me. But more and more “mommy bloggers†are positioning themselves and acting like untouchable prima donnas, “It’s my blog…SO THERE! I can say and do whatever I want.â€
Go right on ahead then honey because when the feds intervene, when state law governing sweepstakes intervene, I will be sure to grab some popcorn. Because I spoke about this issue once, about whether the sweep was a sham, and I was right then, I am right now. Bloggers are rigging their giveaways for winners based on whom THEY want to win, not by chance. Which technically if you as a blogger are conducting yourself in such a manner you are violating federal and state sweepstakes laws by crossing into lottery territory.
“A promotion may be characterized as a lottery if it has all three of the following elements:
I can tell you that those elements would qualify certain bloggers sweeps as lotteries, which are federally regulated and ONLY allowed by states on a discretionary level, so in a morons terms, you just shit all over yourself by violating BIG laws. Forget the FTC, you now have the FCC on your hands for communications violations, the Department of Justice for conspiracy, maybe racketeering if they feel frisky . I will also tell you that giveaways that are held in a CLOSED forum only where you have to be a member and members are only allowed by consideration of the administrator (on whether she likes you or not), well those “giveaways†are now a lottery and up for federal game to investigate if anyone (like me) wanted to blow the whistle on a community providing such an event.
Copyright of MomDot.com
Oh and holding live giveaways on a Blog Talk Radio channel for which again, the above elements are met, are considered a violation of federal law under the 1995 Crime Bill passed by President Clinton, as EVERYONE has to have an opportunity to enter the giveaway. Just sayin’.
Blogging and holding giveaways in this fashion is UNETHICAL. Period. Really, why bother with all the time and effort required in posting a giveaway, listing the giveaway, and promoting if you plan to rig the event for someone you like. Additionally, you are falsifying your stats as a blogger by generating inflation for the sake of premium opportunities with PR and for a “friend†to receive the item because of your comfort level, “rather than some misc. stranger.†Sure, we would not want to run the sweep by chance, just consideration right? Moreover, an “equal dignity†requirement applies.
Discrimination can not be present in treatment of sweepstakes entrants. Those who give some consideration to enter, either by making a payment or by exerting significant effort, may not be treated differently, or more favorably, than those who do not provide consideration. The odds of winning must be substantially similar for both. If the two groups are treated differently, the differential could create pressure for entrants to give consideration, and thus might transform the sweepstakes into an illegal lottery (Bennett, 2007)
So while ethics are pulled into question about giveaways, how about the entrants? I personally am curious as to how they feel about the situation. Spending time entering into giveaways for what they believe is an equal chance to win a prize only to be duped into providing page hits and unique visitor counts daily all in the name of fraud. Or would it be in the name of traffic.
Furthermore, why not notify bloggers sponsors of their behavior, their conduct? What makes these bloggers, no matter how “big†they think they are in the echelon of sorority hens, above the law? Above any code of ethical conduct? Who will hold these bloggers accountable? Or will other bloggers react indignantly, as envious high school snots, who believe they have some intangible form of entitlement to do whatever the f&*k they please? Will they say “Oh they’re just jealousâ€? Jealous? Of two years minimum prison time for conspiracy to defraud? Thanks, but no thanks to Leavenworth. I love the rolling hills of Kansas, but not that much.
My question to you, who will be the checks and balances? Should the government increase their involvement more with mommy bloggers? Should a guild, a quorum no less, of bloggers be built to uphold ethical standards among giveaway blogs and promotions? Or should we go on as business as usual, despite the rampant occurrences of rigged giveaways and winners.
These badges too that are colorfully displayed widgets, mean DIDDLY SHIT! Nothing. Nada. Why? No one and I do mean no one…including the creators of these cute little backlink widgets are doing NOTHING to enforce. Period. Unless the individual displaying the badge is holding him or herself to a higher moral standard, which clearly…we see they are not. I hope to post some good signs of what might be considered a legit giveaway blog, what might not be considered legit, signs to look for when entering giveaways on a blog. Also look to see if your blogger is consistently posting winners, do they post re-draws? A lot of infrequent due to lack of response?
And then you wonder why no one takes a “mommy blogger†seriously at her job.
How can they when she or he is running amok rigging giveaways. Forget all the catty minutiae with back-biting over what broad got to go to what event or who is whatever brand ambassador, this is serious business and the time has come to actually treat the issue as such. Time to own up and grow up.
**Here is my time to own up and grow up.
I got involved with a girl, yes a girl, and she became a friend. You know her, I know her. She WAS my friend. I defended her many times, I became a human friend shield when others attacked her. Until one day she said I was lazy and talked shit behind my back and I had enough of her petty, juvenile, sociopath behavior. Dumb. Why? Because no matter how much I felt she was self-absorbed, immature, and selfish I never said a bad thing about her. I always told her to her face. But the kicker is that now I am being attacked by her pathetic other half for this post and one other because I have an intelligent opinion. My opinion.
Furthermore, the information about the “cheaters” includes her. Did you know that the email transference that outs a blogger listed above in photos also includes this individual? Yes. She was rather eager to provide me the info and took the item being given away to boot. I can also say that the headers were eliminated from the emails that this person sent me, maybe to protect her own ass or maybe because she doesn’t know how. Regardless, Â she too is just as guilty. I will also say that this post was never in any attempt to damage anyone, but to bring light to a situation that is/was rampant in the little immature community known as “mommy blogging.” Â Clearly the situation is one to keep under the carpet, like addiction. The big pink elephant that everyone knows is there but won’t say or do anything about it. Â Regardless, I wrote this, I stick by it. I never back down. I just clarify.
So for clarity’s sake, if you want to know the blogger let me know and I would be happy to do a WHOLE post, because that’s how I roll.
My new job is really really new. Not like it is new to me because I could literally walk this job in my sleep. I am already running circles with it and cannot wait to get on the floor to perform. I know I am tits at my job. As a total perfectionist and over achiever, management is within my sights if I keep my nose clean and perform as and above expectations.
But above all else I am ecstatic about the details of the job.
My job is on the forefront of recovery in the nation. While I wish I could say more, I ambursting with excitement, energy, passion, and unyielding knowledge for this position and how I hope to help so many who are struggling during these rough economic times.
Never in my life has a job been more fitting for my degree in finance, my almost 15 years in lending experience, and my passion to work with people. The job is Cinderella’s slipper to me. As a skeptic to presidential plans and executions with environmental factors (Clinton with FMLA, Bush with…well what did he do..oh right he cried wolf and we invaded…sounds like a little man from Germany that we all know so well from text bookes) and especially now with an economy that is on, in my opinion, a 15 year recovery plan, I am EXCITED to be on the forefront of a presidential plan and execution. A fabulous plan and recovery option for all parties.
If I say more I may reveal too much too soon in my game. But I am OVERFLOWING with excitement and had to share with everyone that my job rocks. Really, totally, absolutely, kicks some major corporate ass, is AWESOME.
Again, never in my life have I been so eager to get to work as I am now. But I know that this job is all about the fact that we got the t-shirt and we are just trying to make sure we can keep our shirt on as well as for others.
Here comes my random babble after a few days. My observation. My out of blog experience.
Funny how I started my new job I was rather concerned on how my life would be changed and yet I was overwhelmingly welcome to the change. While I was and still am concerned for my kids and how my lack of presence in the home would affect them and my family as a whole, everything else went by the way side, and my concern for “everything else” (aka my blog, blah blah) went by the way side as well.
I found myself wanting to tweet for the simple fact that I enjoy connecting with some very lovely people, women, men, business savvy individuals, jokers, and highlighters; then I found that my Twitter stream was rather lame. My blogs that I read, had some family news that I had to comment on, but the other blogs are still the same old shit.
Then I began to wonder why I got so damn hyped about my blog. Why I was so worried. What was I so worried about. What was all the hullabaloo.
Watching as an outsider now is rather entertaining. No, actually HIGHLY entertaining to watch a large group of grown women act like fucking narcissistic assholes, parading around as if their excrement doesn’t emit any odor. For those of you…”you think your shit doesn’t stink” is the lay man definition. Women, biting each other in the back, acting like petty, egoistic webmasters, and acting like they are making some difference in the world or are “tops.” Top what really? Â Top bitch? Tops at stepping on others to get to some glass ceiling? Really? What is this delusion?
Sure they may make a difference somewhere, but they aren’t THAT big of news if you ask me. When you reach Mother Teresa level….then you have made big news, otherwise, what did you ladies coin your phrase, oh yes, “suck it!”
Seriously, I am watching as these women openly Tweet, blog, and maintain their Facebook accounts while their children are being nannied by the television, or by some personal assistant, or purely neglected. I watch as they are so worried about how their blog performs, posting the right hashtags to get noticed, yadda yadda yadda. Who fucking cares. Really? Thinking that is a JOB is no fun, and really, are you making enough to be happy? No. No you are not. In fact, I think many think they can never make enough, or they need to make more. The perpetual cycle of greed.
I love to come back to my blog now. Write about whatever I want, like oh say the talkative broad that I finally asked to be moved away from because I could really care less about anything that came out of her mouth because she was too busy acting like a “top dog” and she knew DIDDLY SHIT! In all actuality she is no different than a lot of bloggers.
I realized then how much I love my job outside of the home, in the real world, with REAL people to interact with daily. How much I really hated to have to update my blog. How much I really DO NOT like interacting in a false fashion with people on the net. Â How I missed genuine interaction. How many of these people ACT like they give a shit, but they have no HUMAN connection to you so they could give a shit. I loved to see that REAL people are being held accountable in REALITY for their actions. No one is above the law.
I have a small niche of people I interact with (you know who you are) whom totally get me, I get them, and I love them because they expect nothing out of me. When I post they dig it, I dig it, because I mean every.word.I.post. I don’t post just to post, as filler or as marketing.
Really…I could give two rat’s asses about marketing too. HA! I love to try stuff, products, whatever, but honestly, my blog is not here for you. It’s here for me. For others to read. My blog is an old friend you can go to and as if time had never passed. For connection, for solace, for a laugh.
I find that my detachment from social media and the interwebs is so fucking refreshing! Truly. Because I can go on Twitter now and connect with my lovies in a fun manner. I can watch all these self-absorbed “Look at me” mommies who have at best an eighth grade style education, but paid for much more. Seriously ladies, you might want to ask for a refund or better stop paying those student loans because your demeanor is a direct reflection.
I can watch my real moms lay out their heart and souls in their posts and still keep a smile saying how they are doing the best darn job they can, with no formal training or manual on how this thing called parenthood works. How they are reinventing themselves as women, as individuals, you can feel their authenticity in their words, in their posts.
Maybe now is the time for people to evaluate what truly matters. The brass tax of life.
I am happy to come home each and every day from my commute, which totally rocks, and to see my garage door climb open and I watch as three beautiful little people come running to my car door to say hello. So I can hear all about their days, what they did, what they ate, who they played with, what they learned. NOTHING, is better than that moment in my entire day. NOTHING is better in my entire life than those kids, my husband.
Hanging up. Disconnecting. Saying I could give a hoot, totally rocks. Because the net could blow up tomorrow and I would still have my family and that is what matters. My blog could die and who cares. Nothing else matters than those who are closest to you in your life. Love and cherish them. Nurture those relations, because all others could fail and if you didn’t have your family….what would you have?
For those of you narcissistic bloggers, I guess at least you would still have your blog right?
Over a year has passed now that our family has had a lack in full time health care coverage. No biggie right? For some yes, for us, we are getting by. I am blessed each and every day that my children are happy “little fuckers” as my son would say and that we are not cursed by tragedy. Knocking on wood.
Last year in February was the last time the twins saw a doctor for their well child check ups. They would have seen a doc last summer had I not called the insurance company to find out whether we needed pre-authorization for Chad’s vasectomy only to find that our policy termed (cancelled by his employer) just two weeks prior.
Spank you. Spank you very much.
So I freaked out. Like any undiagnosed OCD control freak would do, I stewed. I Google’d. I stewed some more. Then I went to the Arizona DES site to look to see if by some far and I do mean FAR FUCKING fetched idea that we would qualify for discounted healthcare coverage. Because as you may or may not know we were railroaded right up the arse, with no lube, on a private care option to which they told us “No Spank you” because I have fake tata’s and The Chad had high blood pressure ONE day that he went to the doctor. BUT, that is a whole rant that I have posted about.
Anyway, where was I? Oh yes, to see if I qualify like all the other free loaders of the nation (right Left Wing whackadoodles!?). Sad, I do not. So what is a family to do with children who need immunizations since we so choose not to have our children infected with nasty illnesses which can cause irreparable damage or death. Stepping down from the box. What are we to do? Other than go a full year with no recent immunizations and all of the sudden remember that in order for the kids to attend preschool, they need UPDATED immunization records.
I conferred with my friend Google again and he sent me to a community site driven for people like me. And people like you. And all people.
I was so happy to see that a day (several actually) existed for a FREE clinic to take my children to so they may receive updated immunizations and vaccinations. WAHOO. Because really I am not going to pay some pompous ass physician who will charge me $80 per child just to walk in the fucking door and then charge me for the vaccinations on top of that which they charge $68 each. GET THE HELL OUT OF TOWN. Free is for me.
So I took my perky blond self and toted the twins to my old stomping ground in Chandler where I drove around my old neighborhood, reminisced, and thought…man…I am so glad we moved out of what is now the ghetto. Anyway, I arrived at the clinic and went in, to what appeared to be a ghost town and was greeted by a lovely woman who was ever so kind. She informed me of the pertinent information and that the vaccinations were available at two that afternoon.
A bit peeved that I drove ALL THE WAY down to the ghetto, but thankful nonetheless for community services. I was then greeted by another woman who then reiterated what the other woman just told me…again…ever so kind.
Until I saw that bitch later that afternoon.
I show up at two that afternoon with two cranky, over shopped, sleep lacking twins into a clinic that was now standing room only. Woman #2 who was kind earlier…now can suck a donkey ear. She looked at me, might as well have been smacking gum in her pie hole as we exchange words:
Her: “Can I help you?” (Tone clearly reeks of what the fuck do you want free loader)
Me: “I was here this morning about the vaccinations?” (are you really THAT busy that you cannot recall me from just FOUR hours ago)
Her: Huff “Fill these out. Bring them to ME. Fill in these bands, put them on the kids, make sure it has their date of birth….have a seat.”
Me: grabs load of papers and looks aimlessly for a pen as I try to recall whether I have stuffed any in my bag. I look over at  a table that has a couple for another health thingy and ask if I can borrow to which I receive this reply.
Her: “HERE….here is a pen.”
Me: “Thank you.”
I survey the what looks to be a small community room that they have converted into a make shift clinic for an ample area to rest my arse and my dynamically grouchy duo. I look around to see only a single chair open and think, um no…cannot corral nor wrangle gnomes with a single chair in the middle of cattle. So I opt for the cozy square on the linoleum floor where I squat Indian style with a gnome on each knee. Then SHE starts in again.
Her: “There is an EMPTY CHAIR up there. You can sit in it.”
Me: looking at her like she is a complete idjut…oh wait…she is…”Apparently the chair is taken and the floor will suffice for now. Thank you.”
Her: “Well…don’t trip anyone or let them trip on you.”
AS FUCKING IF!
Seriously? Okay lady, yes my goal here as the ONLY BLOND in a red shirt in a room full of people will make every effort to trip people as I sit off in a CORNER! The nerve. Really? “don’t trip anyone?” You know me…master tripper. Shit I never tripped on anything but my own feet, let alone trip anyone else. Bitch.
I stew, filling out paperwork, entertaining gnomes and then return the clipboard, paperwork, and pen to HER. She snags the pen as if I were to steal it…which I should have to prove a fucking point, thank her kindly for using it and then she never makes eye contact. Only speaks to me as if I were a third rate human being, to sit and wait until my name is called shortly.
So I sat. FOR. TWO. HOURS.
Until  finally the sharp looking men in casual attire, shorts, t-shirts, and winning smiles called me into the locked room. Sounds frisky right? Nah, just your local firemen doing their community service, serving the public, like me, to insure adequate and up to date vaccinations. I could really get raunchy and say they tag teamed me…but they did in a fashion with needles into my children’s little arms. I even started to cry. I hate seeing them in pain.
But I left thinking I should have captured the moment in the waiting room on my phone. A Hodge-podge of people, some clearly needy, others in my predicament of tight budgets and no health insurance, and others who I wondered what they were doing with their Coach handbags, kids wearing $110 Nike Dunks, texting from the apparently NEWEST of new smart-phones. Granted I could be considered the same…you know with my Goodwill bought cords, a t-shirt that says VIVA Elvis on it that The Chad bought for me while he was in Memphis, my favorite Jambu shoes, and my Palm Pre Plus. All of which cost me $30 plus whatever the feds charge me on this years coming taxes.
But still. I am always curious about people’s stories of life, how we all end up in the same room with the same needs at the same time. Especially since we are all there for our children. Are our paths the same? Was I viewed as a free-loader? What is really sad, is that we look at people who are in rough times and reach out for these services during these rough times because that is what they were created for, and we call them free loaders. Well what the hell else other than the federal deficit do my taxes go for?
I am ever so grateful today for the Chandler CARE Center, the staff (even if they were less than desirable in their customer service skills), the nursing staff from Chandler Regional Hospitals, the firefighters, and the volunteers. Without your dedication, my children would not be vaccinated nor would the eight children before and the many after mine. Thank you.
Are you a fan of yogurt? Are you familiar with Yoplait as a brand in yogurt in your home?
Well you are in luck because I am holding a giveaway for Yoplait to promote their YoPlus yogurt line. So most of us know that yogurt is absolutely fantastic for your health right? Ladies did you know that yogurt can actually ward and prevent yeast infections? YES! My doctor shared that fabulous information with me when I asked about eating yogurt when I was pregnant (since I was concerned about what to eat) and he told me to GOBBLE yogurt, because the natural cultures are fabulous for women’s health. Additionally, yogurt and the active and live cultures, or “probiotics,” are excellent for digestive health.
In fact Yoplait reformulated their YoPlus line to provide excellent health benefits in each cup. Could you add more benefits, is the question I asked. They answered by adding antioxidant vitamins like A and E which are great for your skin and eyes, calcium and vitamin D for bone health (ladies….great for future prevention of osteoporosis), and finally the probiotic cultures and fiber for excellent digestive health.
But if you are nay-saying about yogurt and the “same old boring flavors,” BEHOLD! Yoplait kicked up the flavor amplifier by adding flavors like blackberry pomegranate and blueberry acai in addition to your favorites like strawberry, peach, vanilla and cherry.
Yogurt is a great addition to any diet as a snack or part of a meal with the amount of calories, the fiber leaves you feeling full, and hey the sweet tooth is satisfied too if you are worried about breaking your healthy new way of life and eating.
The first 50 readers will receive the opportunity to try Yoplait YoPlus for free! Don’t fret if you are not one of the first 50 to sign up, you will still receive a $1.00 off coupon for a 4-pack of Yoplait YoPlus yogurt. So go on! Click the “Try It Free” tab and let The Five Fish and Yoplait send you a coupon for FREE Yoplait YoPlus yogurt to chow on in your home.
*Yoplait provided me with this opportunity and all corresponding information, unless stated otherwise.
Lately I admit I have had no desire to write, blog, share. PERIOD. When the sudden change of life events happened I haven’t even had a chance to digest my options, weigh pros and cons, the event horizon landed and now I am left to deal with my spinning.
I talked with my sister the other day (GASP, I know…we may fight but she’s still my sister) and we both agreed on one thing (GASP…I know, we agreed) which is we could shut our blogs down and say “Who gives a fuck.” Because really that is who I am. Â I came to the conclusion that my writing has been driven based on what my audience wants to read, what would be “PG blog material” for PR or whomever. Why do I give a shit about that? I DON’T!
My life is NOT DEFINED by my blog, my blog defines my life.
My writings talk about my feelings, my life, how my life is like everyone else. Struggling to sometimes get through the day feeling unappreciated, alone, at times feeling unloved with the effort and hard work we put into our homes, working an ever thankless job that is glorified to be some great fucking experience. Not everyday is a picnic.
Granted, motherhood has MOMENTS that are to be cherished. When Grant told me when I was 6 months pregnant with the twins and as huge as a house and we went to a wedding, he told me how I looked like a princess. I melted. When the twins told me for the first time “Lub yoo,” I got teary eyed. But other moments and days are robotic, insane, going through the motions of day-to-day. Seriously, we can take a licking and keep on ticking.
I also began to ponder how asinine the parent-child relationship is defined. I mean, our children can hit us with no repercussion but if we spank them, child services is banging on our door calling us “abusers.” Do you see the insanity? I am not suggesting we go wail on our children, but come on, the suggestion just screams what the shit. Â I digress. Back to my rant.
Someday’s I find I would rather not blog. Being a mother of twins is challenging. To say the least. Sharing how dealing with two toddlers wears away at every inch of you brings on nay-sayers about “Well I have two toddlers…and they aren’t twins….I can do it.” Good for fucking you. When you deliver two at the same time either through your vagina or an intricately cut incision into your perfectly uncut skin, then let’s talk. It’s not a damn competition…
And that’s where I find myself lacking motivation. The constant judgment of you are only as good a mother as you share on your blog. You are only as good as your blog. I can’t access your blog, blah blah fuckity blah. Let me say this again:
MY. LIFE. IS. NOT. DEFINED. BY. MY. BLOG. MY. LIFE. IS. DEFINED. ON. MY. BLOG.
Which leads me to the fact that if you don’t like that I drop the “f” bomb, don’t read it. I try to limit my use, but why? It’s my blog, these are the feelings and thoughts in my head and really, I use the work fuck as a proposition, noun, verb, adjective, hell, even as a conjunction in my sentences when I talk at home. *GASP and yes….in front of my children. I would rather they hear the word from me than from Billy down the street, then I only have myself to blame for my child telling sixth graders they are “fuckers” and throwing rocks at them in a taunting fashion.
So I beg the question, why worry so much about what other people think? About the language used? Because Barbara Bible-thumping Bozo doesn’t like it? Well go pray for me Barbara. Because some Linda says I won’t get opportunity. Cry me a FUCKING river Linda and write some letter in your basement, since opportunity does not motivate me to write. Or my audience does not appreciate what I am writing about….the fact that my kids do not shit rainbows and sunshine, singing like harmonic angels, and I with my perfect hair…I am just missing some pearls to top off the air of perfection right?
Get the hell outta here. I find that my audience is not who they used to be anymore if in fact my audience even exists. Well, Ellen I know you are reading this, so big hugs to you woman. I am finding I am sick of being like everyone else and their damned canned sunshine, or no, sorry, bottle of sunshine with Xanax or whatever fucking concoction your doctor prescribed with this medicated mommies bullshit. Really? You are proud to be hyped up as a way to deal? Shit…then by all means blog. I have no bottle of hype, I have no medication. However, I have great stories, I have great experiences, I have lots to share that have not been touched on because God, Allah, Buddha, Higher Power, forbid I offend, scare, or not play by the rules. Heaven forbid I admit that some days my life feels like a pile of shit and the people who are my friends abuse my kindness. That some days I want to blog about how my husband could do me the fucking favor of putting the butter knife used to make his sandwich in the dishwasher that is three feet away, rather than leaving it on the counter for HOURS. Other days I want to scream about how my twins are Tasmanian devils when they float from room to room making messes and I wish they would just sit and play with me because I won’t be able to do that later in life with them. Why I do care about these blogging rules and playing by them. I never played by them in real life. So why should I play by the rules now?
