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Has Social Media Become Anti Social Media
A friend of mine posted the other day about how Facebook has turned into a feed of others posting videos they have seen and no longer a forum for conversation. His comment was profound to say the least.
“Do people still actually post things here or is just a forum to share videos you found on the internet?”
Our social media venues have become more of the anti social media as we fail to engage one another. Social media (Facebook, Twitter, Instagram) seem to have transformed into venues of mental masturbation to help pass the minutes as we exercise, exercise bowel movements and or exercise our lack of effort into our careers and selves.
Many a late nights I used to delve into Twitter and Facebook. Twitter especially, as I engaged on many a conversations, albeit some superficial “mom talk,” as my twins were much younger and I found an online community of other women who had the same subscription of life. Bantering, high level disagreements and even some catty non-sense. However, the result was all the same. Conversation.
Today I see Twitter as a monologue, at best. Almost like a telemarketing convention where all of the sellers are dialing out to potential consumers with their tweets in hopes someone will buy their sales pitch. I was saddened to see my own church guilty of the same actions. Services were provided with a hashtag to “join the conversation.” Really? Who would we be conversing with? Other members I suppose, but I found that to be very anti social as well with other members tweeting, never actually engaging in a dialogue.
Facebook has transformed itself into much of the same fashion…coupled with the sisterhood of Instagram. Timelines are littered with selfies and no longer original and or beautiful content. I have watched these two venues turn into a cesspool of narcissism interlaced into being “social.” Social would be how many likes you received for your newest photo and nothing really ever of a conversation.
Have we let our new technology and new forms of communication dilute, if not totally eliminate, any true forms of communication or dialogue? Or is this the way we communicate now these days with pictures, videos, selfies and emoticons? How do we begin to converse with one another again?
With advancements of technology and forms of communication have we catapulted ourselves into the age of anti social media? Recalling an email I received from my dad about 10 years ago, he provided me his new phone number when he was living in Iowa and said, “text me if you want to talk.” I replied and guffawed at such a request, “I don’t text Dad.” Was I flippant, naive, optimistic that communication would remain status-quo? Maybe a combination of all three, never in my wildest dreams would I consider communicating with my parents, let alone my friends in such a fashion. Never would I have imagined creating a blog when just six months pregnant to detail the chronology of my twins in utero, their lives thereafter, our lives in their entirety as a collective over the past eight years.
I suppose since our lives are so busy, social media helps to keep us abreast of all of friends goings-on. Maybe we help show them our interests with the different shares and social likes through Facebook and Twitter. Social media has helped us connect with one another instantly and receive updates on breaking events in the blink of an eye as opposed to waiting for the following day or the late evening newscast. Yet, we seem to be more anti social because we have updates so frequently, so immediate that we can even sever friendships with the click of a button, block the information we receive, filter our lives to seem, feel and look perfect.
Have these “social” venues created an opportunity of anti social behavior?
Social media has allowed us to avoid having meaningful and legitimate dialogues with the click of a button, removing people from our lives when conversations become crucial. While we can connect immediately, we can disconnect just as easily. As opposed to having a healthy dialogue, we just shut the conversation down with block, delete, un-follow, unlike. We can avoid sharing how our lives are imperfect by sharing some of the best photos of the day when the picture behind the camera would suggest normal humanity, beautifully broken. Suddenly we have keyboard muscles that we exert as our form of exercise, because to exercise our mental capacity to accept diversity that something is less than perfect or a comment is less than favorable we remove the threat. Our behavior on social media is dramatically different that in person, acting as if we lack any inhibition to hurting another because we may not actually have real life interaction with people.
Have you found yourself in the vortex of anti social media? Have you found you are only sharing videos and other posts and never really engaging in real, healthy conversations or dialogues? Has your social media become a monologue and not a dialogue?
Not An Ordinary Year Later
One year and one month ago I had received frantic phone calls about a nasty post on Twitter about my personal life choices that concerned no one else except myself and my husband. Looking back on this past year I question the validity of the ownership of the Twitter account and the individual who psycho dialed my phone to notify me and disrupt my seemingly perfect thankful world.
As the last twelve months have passed and various events have taken place and decisions I have made are both shameful and noteworthy I regret nothing. I can only take with me the knowledge that the last year has presented not only as a mother, woman, wife, sister and friend but the knowledge of an ever evolving person. Taking into account that what really matters doesn’t exist in an IP or within any WWW. I spent so much time trying to convince others of my actions, my statements and my otherwise because so many felt they “knew” me because I made myself, my life, and my children so public. My publishings of what makes me, me, were dissected and torn to shreds.
But I have always been the “put myself out there” extrovert. As a genuine friend, sister, lover, and wife I have always operated with a no holds barred formality with nothing to hide, nothing to be shameful for, and this last year has been one where I am a bit more precocious with being so open, so inviting and such a friend.
I found that the people I have and had become acquainted with and some who have had my luxury to be called a friend are nothing but pure narcissists. I say this as my segue into the Twitter account that attacked my character, my family, and my personal right to privacy. Because I have always been so open someone who claimed to be my friend used me as their personal shield in attacks on other people online. Petty and pathetic really considering that these people are menial and mean absolutely diddly fucking shit, however, the personal attack was anything but menial and a nothingness. The Twitter account was “supposedly” created by Tanya Gordon, someone who I have come to know online through our personal correspondence outside of the social media eye. However, the more I have investigated the account the more I have come to believe that the account was really created by Kristin Lesney in a weak effort to draw attention to herself. If you consider the situation, she always knew when the account tweeted, her attorney DID NOT have the account removed from Twitter, the account disappeared shortly after Tanya and I began conversing and I was sharing the information I was privy to based on my dealings and interactions with Kristin and her obsession to destroy Tanya and any other blogger for that matter that attempted to get in her way of supposed social media success. So much to that I decided to play devils advocate and investigate this account.
Now you ask, why would someone who was so stoutly against the account that attacked them, create such a gruesome account. Why not is my question to you. Why not create a negative account you can control and use as weapon against another individual, including yourself. You can make someone look entirely too guilty by pointing a finger at them by attacking yourself and those who you claim are your friends. This is called misdirection, projection, and pure evil. Maybe this is a far fetched call and some will holler and clamor hogwash, ergo the account is effective right? The lemmings all run to jump off the cliff in belief.
Either way, I always wondered why if Tanya supposedly created this account why the hell did Kristin not get her $20,000 that they demanded because really wouldn’t that be a return on your investment of $3000. I mean what do I have to gain from any of them or any of this online blogging? I do not call this my “job” or where I make a living. But can you see why Kristin would gain, she could gain a whole gaggle of new lemmings to dupe into the belief Tanya is some anti-Christ of blogging. Regardless, what a punch of phooey and pettiness on behalf of a grown woman. I can undoubtedly say I am glad my life is one year older and one year wiser and free of the nonsense.
GMO HFCS Organic and Bullshit…OH MY!
Proud to say I have detached myself from the mommy blog cancer that explodes rather cyclically with the mud slinging and pettiness. I admit that every now and I again I will hop on Twitter anxious to maintain connections I have made only because I have had the opportunity to interact with some truly amazing women.
But when I log on and see women, acting like little girls, and encompassing their family in their small-minded attacks on trivial life items. The title should tell you what situation I refer. Come on ladies…first it was stay at home versus the working mom…now this?
I suppose a scattered number of posts have gone up on blogs recently regarding HFCS – High Fructose Corn Syrup. Then I saw the attacks go up with women who are stoutly against this food dominating additive.
Then I did some research….and then I had my last laugh.
In particular, I saw a mom try to laden her entire Twitter stream with #organic hash tags and  minutiae and just laughed harder. Why?
Do you see where my bus is rolling? Oh yes, right over the top of the bullshit I caught a whiff of, where a mom and “influencer” made a weak attempt to state that she feeds her family NOTHING but organic. Really?
Let’s take a gander at the ingredients of the new PF Chang’s Home Menu haute cuisine that was overlooked in the organic revolution:
Holy heart stopper Batman! Can you read this? If not I can send you some phonics that spells out nothing in this package suggests “organic,” furthermore can you NOT see the sodium levels in just ONE, yes ONE serving of dim sum. Over 65% of your daily allowance in that tasty treat. Excuse me….I must go hurl over the bullshit ingested in that. Oh and the fact that this qualifies under “pre-packaged and boxed meals” only makes me want to shove my wrist in my throat to induce MORE vomiting. Add the ogenated, preservatives, gluten and other miscellaneous non-organic and non-natural items. Hurl-a-licious baby. Makes me want to run out, buy it, eat it, and then lie that I never bought it, ate it, and gained some extra poundage to my weight loss venture. Gag me with a spoon Valley Girl. Seriously that meal could make me bulimic reading the ingredients.
Moving on now to the whip cream in a can. I love this topic, because the same mom boasting #organic like the Dems and their “ObamaCare” had NO IDEA, or maybe she did and she was too much the beguiler. Which yes, I used that word from my mostly online university education you whoreson. Ah, I digress. Task at hand, yes the ingredients of the CANNED whip cream.
So the cream is generally sweetened by…wait for it…wait for it….corn syrup. Please refer back to the first picture so you can see the canned goodness derived from cream and corn syrup.
There I said it. Now this mother was let me state again, a STOUT Boswell, or better a beguiling backer. She supports without merit. For those still in the 10 year undergraduate program, this is an unsupported citation. Citing information with no merit or with fault. Again, I digress. Regardless, she is pushing the fact that she ONLY, Â yes ONLY goes organic. How can you say you ONLY do organic in your home but then post a picture of your shopping cart that supports high fructose corn syrup in your diet? Because you are full of shit, that is why.
So I beg the question? Why the hell if you are such a strong opponent to high fructose corn syrup and GMO (genetically modified) foods are you eating the strongest offenders of shit in your diet?
Oh did I mention the heart stopping sodium which also leads to obesity, heart disease, high blood pressure which also leads to kidney failure among other health issues? Oh and alcohol consumption…did you know there are over 760 calories in one margarita? Drink on ass wipe. It’s not high fructose corn syrup making you fat you fuck, its the margarita and canned whip cream. Why are you going on the offense to attack other mothers who are embracing capitalism at it’s finest by agreeing to sponsored posts on behalf of the Corn Refiners and Mom Central?
Because you think you have a soap box, so let me show you some critically acclaimed information for your soap box next time you get on a rant. Which is clear your Twitter stream of posts about eating junk food, drinking high calorie alcoholic beverages, clear the fact you are a high school drop out, haven’t held a real job in years, and that your real job is as an amateur blogger..yes…I said amateur. Because when you ramble on and contradict yourself, you are a dumb fuck. Period.
If you want to know more about genetically modified foods, organic (which is merely a matter of marketing because at the base of the matter, everything is organic, everything is “organic” matter. In closing, next time you try to step up onto a soap box and preach your higher living be sure to check your soap box is not a steaming pile of bullshit.
Sweepin for Traffic
I sat here writing endlessly on how to broach this topic tactfully, tastefully, and with bold tenacity. Only to come out empty handed and having the audience of readers say, “huh?†So while no tact may exist I will pour out the information. Some of you may have read a wonderful article on ShePosts.com. I was rather skeptical of ShePosts thinking the site was to stir the pot, cause drama, get mommy bloggers riled, and I am happy to report I was wrong. I feel the authors provide fabulous unbiased, or with as little bias as possible, on important topics that affect the business of mommy blogging or blogging.
The article on ShePosts quickly touched on ethics and what bloggers can do about their ethics of giveaways on their blog.
My take… I loved it. I ENJOYED with my WHOLE HEART being the “anonymous†to out these “ethical†blog badge toting liars. I have proof of bloggers, LOTS of bloggers, agreeing to forge giveaways. Unfortunately too, I was the recipient of a forged giveaway and found out months after the fact. This DID NOT sit well with me. The idea did not sit well with me, the knowledge I had, that bloggers think this sort of behavior is perfectly acceptable stirred a FIRE in me. But more and more “mommy bloggers†are positioning themselves and acting like untouchable prima donnas, “It’s my blog…SO THERE! I can say and do whatever I want.â€
Go right on ahead then honey because when the feds intervene, when state law governing sweepstakes intervene, I will be sure to grab some popcorn. Because I spoke about this issue once, about whether the sweep was a sham, and I was right then, I am right now. Bloggers are rigging their giveaways for winners based on whom THEY want to win, not by chance. Which technically if you as a blogger are conducting yourself in such a manner you are violating federal and state sweepstakes laws by crossing into lottery territory.
“A promotion may be characterized as a lottery if it has all three of the following elements:
- Chance
- A prize
- Consideration†(Steven Bennet, An Introduction to Sweepstakes and Contest Laws, 2007)
I can tell you that those elements would qualify certain bloggers sweeps as lotteries, which are federally regulated and ONLY allowed by states on a discretionary level, so in a morons terms, you just shit all over yourself by violating BIG laws. Forget the FTC, you now have the FCC on your hands for communications violations, the Department of Justice for conspiracy, maybe racketeering if they feel frisky . I will also tell you that giveaways that are held in a CLOSED forum only where you have to be a member and members are only allowed by consideration of the administrator (on whether she likes you or not), well those “giveaways†are now a lottery and up for federal game to investigate if anyone (like me) wanted to blow the whistle on a community providing such an event.
Oh and holding live giveaways on a Blog Talk Radio channel for which again, the above elements are met, are considered a violation of federal law under the 1995 Crime Bill passed by President Clinton, as EVERYONE has to have an opportunity to enter the giveaway. Just sayin’.
Blogging and holding giveaways in this fashion is UNETHICAL. Period. Really, why bother with all the time and effort required in posting a giveaway, listing the giveaway, and promoting if you plan to rig the event for someone you like. Additionally, you are falsifying your stats as a blogger by generating inflation for the sake of premium opportunities with PR and for a “friend†to receive the item because of your comfort level, “rather than some misc. stranger.†Sure, we would not want to run the sweep by chance, just consideration right? Moreover, an “equal dignity†requirement applies.
Discrimination can not be present in treatment of sweepstakes entrants. Those who give some consideration to enter, either by making a payment or by exerting significant effort, may not be treated differently, or more favorably, than those who do not provide consideration. The odds of winning must be substantially similar for both. If the two groups are treated differently, the differential could create pressure for entrants to give consideration, and thus might transform the sweepstakes into an illegal lottery (Bennett, 2007)
So while ethics are pulled into question about giveaways, how about the entrants? I personally am curious as to how they feel about the situation. Spending time entering into giveaways for what they believe is an equal chance to win a prize only to be duped into providing page hits and unique visitor counts daily all in the name of fraud. Or would it be in the name of traffic.
Furthermore, why not notify bloggers sponsors of their behavior, their conduct? What makes these bloggers, no matter how “big†they think they are in the echelon of sorority hens, above the law? Above any code of ethical conduct? Who will hold these bloggers accountable? Or will other bloggers react indignantly, as envious high school snots, who believe they have some intangible form of entitlement to do whatever the f&*k they please? Will they say “Oh they’re just jealousâ€? Jealous? Of two years minimum prison time for conspiracy to defraud? Thanks, but no thanks to Leavenworth. I love the rolling hills of Kansas, but not that much.
My question to you, who will be the checks and balances? Should the government increase their involvement more with mommy bloggers? Should a guild, a quorum no less, of bloggers be built to uphold ethical standards among giveaway blogs and promotions? Or should we go on as business as usual, despite the rampant occurrences of rigged giveaways and winners.
These badges too that are colorfully displayed widgets, mean DIDDLY SHIT! Nothing. Nada. Why? No one and I do mean no one…including the creators of these cute little backlink widgets are doing NOTHING to enforce. Period. Unless the individual displaying the badge is holding him or herself to a higher moral standard, which clearly…we see they are not. I hope to post some good signs of what might be considered a legit giveaway blog, what might not be considered legit, signs to look for when entering giveaways on a blog. Also look to see if your blogger is consistently posting winners, do they post re-draws? A lot of infrequent due to lack of response?
And then you wonder why no one takes a “mommy blogger†seriously at her job.
How can they when she or he is running amok rigging giveaways. Forget all the catty minutiae with back-biting over what broad got to go to what event or who is whatever brand ambassador, this is serious business and the time has come to actually treat the issue as such. Time to own up and grow up.
**Here is my time to own up and grow up.
I got involved with a girl, yes a girl, and she became a friend. You know her, I know her. She WAS my friend. I defended her many times, I became a human friend shield when others attacked her. Until one day she said I was lazy and talked shit behind my back and I had enough of her petty, juvenile, sociopath behavior. Dumb. Why? Because no matter how much I felt she was self-absorbed, immature, and selfish I never said a bad thing about her. I always told her to her face. But the kicker is that now I am being attacked by her pathetic other half for this post and one other because I have an intelligent opinion. My opinion.
Furthermore, the information about the “cheaters” includes her. Did you know that the email transference that outs a blogger listed above in photos also includes this individual? Yes. She was rather eager to provide me the info and took the item being given away to boot. I can also say that the headers were eliminated from the emails that this person sent me, maybe to protect her own ass or maybe because she doesn’t know how. Regardless, Â she too is just as guilty. I will also say that this post was never in any attempt to damage anyone, but to bring light to a situation that is/was rampant in the little immature community known as “mommy blogging.” Â Clearly the situation is one to keep under the carpet, like addiction. The big pink elephant that everyone knows is there but won’t say or do anything about it. Â Regardless, I wrote this, I stick by it. I never back down. I just clarify.
So for clarity’s sake, if you want to know the blogger let me know and I would be happy to do a WHOLE post, because that’s how I roll.
Did I say I gave a
Shit.
Fuck.
Damn.
No. No I do not.
Here comes my random babble after a few days. My observation. My out of blog experience.
Funny how I started my new job I was rather concerned on how my life would be changed and yet I was overwhelmingly welcome to the change. While I was and still am concerned for my kids and how my lack of presence in the home would affect them and my family as a whole, everything else went by the way side, and my concern for “everything else” (aka my blog, blah blah) went by the way side as well.
I found myself wanting to tweet for the simple fact that I enjoy connecting with some very lovely people, women, men, business savvy individuals, jokers, and highlighters; then I found that my Twitter stream was rather lame. My blogs that I read, had some family news that I had to comment on, but the other blogs are still the same old shit.
Then I began to wonder why I got so damn hyped about my blog. Why I was so worried. What was I so worried about. What was all the hullabaloo.
Watching as an outsider now is rather entertaining. No, actually HIGHLY entertaining to watch a large group of grown women act like fucking narcissistic assholes, parading around as if their excrement doesn’t emit any odor. For those of you…”you think your shit doesn’t stink” is the lay man definition. Women, biting each other in the back, acting like petty, egoistic webmasters, and acting like they are making some difference in the world or are “tops.” Top what really? Â Top bitch? Tops at stepping on others to get to some glass ceiling? Really? What is this delusion?
Sure they may make a difference somewhere, but they aren’t THAT big of news if you ask me. When you reach Mother Teresa level….then you have made big news, otherwise, what did you ladies coin your phrase, oh yes, “suck it!”
Seriously, I am watching as these women openly Tweet, blog, and maintain their Facebook accounts while their children are being nannied by the television, or by some personal assistant, or purely neglected. I watch as they are so worried about how their blog performs, posting the right hashtags to get noticed, yadda yadda yadda. Who fucking cares. Really? Thinking that is a JOB is no fun, and really, are you making enough to be happy? No. No you are not. In fact, I think many think they can never make enough, or they need to make more. The perpetual cycle of greed.
I love to come back to my blog now. Write about whatever I want, like oh say the talkative broad that I finally asked to be moved away from because I could really care less about anything that came out of her mouth because she was too busy acting like a “top dog” and she knew DIDDLY SHIT! In all actuality she is no different than a lot of bloggers.
I realized then how much I love my job outside of the home, in the real world, with REAL people to interact with daily. How much I really hated to have to update my blog. How much I really DO NOT like interacting in a false fashion with people on the net. Â How I missed genuine interaction. How many of these people ACT like they give a shit, but they have no HUMAN connection to you so they could give a shit. I loved to see that REAL people are being held accountable in REALITY for their actions. No one is above the law.
I have a small niche of people I interact with (you know who you are) whom totally get me, I get them, and I love them because they expect nothing out of me. When I post they dig it, I dig it, because I mean every.word.I.post. I don’t post just to post, as filler or as marketing.
Really…I could give two rat’s asses about marketing too. HA! I love to try stuff, products, whatever, but honestly, my blog is not here for you. It’s here for me. For others to read. My blog is an old friend you can go to and as if time had never passed. For connection, for solace, for a laugh.
I find that my detachment from social media and the interwebs is so fucking refreshing! Truly. Because I can go on Twitter now and connect with my lovies in a fun manner. I can watch all these self-absorbed “Look at me” mommies who have at best an eighth grade style education, but paid for much more. Seriously ladies, you might want to ask for a refund or better stop paying those student loans because your demeanor is a direct reflection.
I can watch my real moms lay out their heart and souls in their posts and still keep a smile saying how they are doing the best darn job they can, with no formal training or manual on how this thing called parenthood works. How they are reinventing themselves as women, as individuals, you can feel their authenticity in their words, in their posts.
Maybe now is the time for people to evaluate what truly matters. The brass tax of life.
I am happy to come home each and every day from my commute, which totally rocks, and to see my garage door climb open and I watch as three beautiful little people come running to my car door to say hello. So I can hear all about their days, what they did, what they ate, who they played with, what they learned. NOTHING, is better than that moment in my entire day. NOTHING is better in my entire life than those kids, my husband.
Hanging up. Disconnecting. Saying I could give a hoot, totally rocks. Because the net could blow up tomorrow and I would still have my family and that is what matters. My blog could die and who cares. Nothing else matters than those who are closest to you in your life. Love and cherish them. Nurture those relations, because all others could fail and if you didn’t have your family….what would you have?
For those of you narcissistic bloggers, I guess at least you would still have your blog right?
I admit I am shallow
I feel I have failed to be honest on my blog. After a very strong discussion with The Chad I had the ultimate slap. I put on a happy face for the blog because in the event I post that my life is not all roses and rainbows….well let’s face it…you would rather watch the damn news than read about some woman on the internet.
Truly my blog and persona are me, but to some degree they are lacking luster, a true persona that screams I am coming back for more on this blog. While I am not one to sensationalize by any means in the manner of feeding off of others pain or disadvantages for the fact to make me feel better I do feel like to be completely blunt.
Maybe my fear of rejection is what is holding me back in really laying everything out to tell you that I make fun of myself by calling myself little Miss Perfect. While I do TRY to do everything perfect….I am the most damaged human being I have had the pleasure to meet every single day. I fear being rejected because I am not perfect, because I really like to use the F word as a noun, adjective, conjunction, pronoun, and verb to name a few. I used to smoke. I like to drink when I am in a mood….which is actually rare but at least once a year I like to get a good buzz on that the next day I look around like….Um…who was that broad?
I also would like to get to know you. All 721 of you. Yes…even if that takes me years I would like to do it. A guest post from you at least once a week. You may think…has she completely lost it? But I haven’t. I know so little about you as readers that I want to hear about you…an insight into your psyche, who you are, what makes you tick, unique, if you enter a helluva lot of giveaways or you are a fellow blogger or hey you like to just read blogs period I want to know.
So no more Little Miss Perfect from me…though she is my alter ego…be prepared for a whole new year of posts. Oh and yes I will still have some KICKIN’ giveaways and what have you….but I want you to come here and read about some jaw dropping truths that say “sweet…I am so not alone!”
Please fill out my form for the guest posts….otherwise I will hunt your ass down and email it to you…and hound you weekly if not daily until you return it and I can feature you on my blog. Because that’s how I roll.
Blogs are Heartbreak Warfare
While jogging tonight I suddenly was overwhelmed by emotion. A huge sweeping wave that I have been fighting; for how long who knows. Tears came streaming and I fought them, I fought the burn. I used the excuse of the cold night air and the fact I just sprinted three-quarters of a mile, the burn in my chest, the ache, just the run. Then I smelled manure. Yes, that is it, just the manure for the rye grass seed of the prima Donna yards of the Arizona winter.
The burn faded as I began to power walk and breathe swiftly, the manure had subsided, the wave was now a tsunami. What was this feeling, why the onset of sadness, the overbearing feeling of emotion beating at my chest, weighing on my heart and mind. I felt as my head were in a tailspin, my eyes gravitated to the night sky to gaze upon the stars to ease this ache. My iPod was shuffling songs with varying beats per minute to keep me in line with my jog when finally I was floored by John Mayer.
I had listened to the song many times before, not a problem. Suddenly this song meant so much more to me today, at this moment than it ever had before. I realized the pain I was feeling was that of the last year and most recent events in my and others lives. The cost was my emotional toll of all these events. So much of my own emotion has been laid ever so bravely, albeit sometimes foolishly (to always wear my heart on my sleeve), with my blog. I have watched others do the same. Most recently a mother who experienced the most horrific tragedy fell victim to more pain because of her choice to bravely share an experience, to avoid her solitary confinement of despair, shock, and grief. Others have been victim to bad blood of failed business relations, failed friendships, even families are ever divided. In some situations the division could equate to infamous literary feuds: Montague v. Capulet and Hatfield v. McCoy.
Each story a heart, each heart a soul, and for each soul is one person sharing his or her story. Most share the story out of love, the love of writing, the love of life, the love of children, the love of their story because so many feel their pain, their joy, whatever the distinguished emotion, their situation is not exclusive, and yet so often we look at the blog, the tweet, the update as true social media, notwithstanding the true MEDIA aspect of news. Our posts are not FOX news, a breaking story from CNN, but a simple soul, an individual sharing their love for their life and the experiences they share no matter how callous, heartless, devastating, shocking, appalling, or deplorable.
Our blogs, our updates, our Tweets have become quite literally, and thank you John Mayer, Heartbreak Warfare. Jealousy fuels because of the lack of PR exclusivity, bombs of hate between former friends (and family) who cannot come to civil terms, families feuding for lack of understanding, compassion is the last to be shared by those involved or by the trippers. I am truly saddened by the many events of this year; the loss of my grandfather, the deterioration of the relationship with my sister (which if you know me and my blog, I have always shared such a special love for her), the deterioration of my friend and her sisters relationship, friends driving knives deeper and deeper, people being petty, not wanting to eat crow, swallow pride for the sake of humility, maybe even an ounce of humanity, compassion. No one has to be the best of friends, but a bit of human compassion could be called upon, only more pain is what remains.
I leave you with the lyrics to this song that resonated such powerful emotions within me, also my farewell into the New Year as I reflect on the year that was, the year to come, and my hope for this holiday is that the ugly line to fade and people start crossing the lines into humanity, compassion, empathy.
Our blogs are not news, we are people, ALL of us. We all have a heart, a soul, we all feel at some level.
Lightning strikes
Inside, my chest to keep me up at night
Dream of ways
To make you understand my pain
Let’s just fix this whole thing now
I swear to God we’re gonna get it right
If you lay your weapon down
Red wine and Ambien
You’re talking shit again, it’s heartbreak warfare
Good to know it’s all a game
Disappointment has a name, it’s heartbreak warfare.
Inside, my chest to keep me up at night
Dream of ways
To make you understand my pain
Clouds of sulfur in the air
Bombs are falling everywhere
It’s heartbreak warfare
Once you want it to begin,
No one really ever wins
In heartbreak warfare
If you want more love,
why don’t you say so?
If you want more love,
why don’t you say so?
Drop his name
Push it in and twist the knife again
Watch my face
As I pretend to feel no pain
Clouds of sulfur in the air
Bombs are falling everywhere
It’s heartbreak warfare
Once you want it to begin,
No one really ever wins
In heartbreak warfare.
If you want more love,
why don’t you say so?
If you want more love,
why don’t you say so?
Just say so…
How come the only way to know how high you get me
is to see how far I fall
God only knows how much I’d love you if you let me
but I can’t break through at all.
It’s a heartbreak…
I don’t care if we don’t sleep at all tonightLet’s just fix this whole thing now
I swear to God we’re gonna get it right
If you lay your weapon down
Red wine and Ambien
You’re talking shit again, it’s heartbreak warfare
Good to know it’s all a game
Disappointment has a name, it’s heartbreak warfare.
Did We Need to Go There
My blog has never been one for controversy. I leave controversy to many face-to-face communications. Body language can be read and understood, as can eye movement, facial expressions, tone. Tone is often hard to communicate in writing. One must be a skilled author to have the finesse to emit tone in the conversation. So controversy as I said is left to the true verbal arena so as not to encounter miscommunications or to misunderstand.
So my tone is about to go to a beaten path NEVER taken before. EVER. I will probably lose blog followers and I am deeply sorry. I will not yield nor apologize for my personal life, my personal decisions, something that completely affects me, with the exception of my husband as he was a very intricate part of my life in this decision.
Once upon a Thanksgiving in 2009 a young woman who spent two days prepping, cleaning, cooking and baking, not to mention caring for her three children. Might I add, two of which are twins in case you are just tuning into the Fish Film @ 11, and I work a full-time job, a real. full time job. Not just the job of mom, you see that is my first job, my real job is my third job, my second job is wife, and my fourth job is business owner. So you see I truly have FOUR FULL time jobs….ah hell five if you add all the housework. So back to it, I was cleaning up after a much enjoyed pie hole stuffing event. Family was gathered on my couch, every seat taken, reading Black Friday ads, friends were conversing, laughs shared abound. As the crowd began to simmer and disperse I thought I need to call my dear friend who so lovingly called to share in her thanks and love on this day. But in addition to the love to be shared was the hate that this ugly world can bring. Not hate by my friend, the hate of strangers, the hate of those who put up a loving facade to avoid confrontation, the hate spewed behind anonymity to win out in some delusional war of words.
Please be advised that the images you are about to see are repulsive, obscene, disgusting, and horrid. All directed AT ME. I debated on posting these images and by rehashing information I so prayed to disappear, but the glutton in me took pictures of the proof of hate generated by people.
For privacy reasons the images were removed and can only be viewed by invitation only.
As I said. I apologize for any and ALL of you to read this ugliness. I was so physically ill on Thursday I could barely sleep. I was shaking, I was borderline inconsolable. My husband, bless his heart, reassured me to ignore this. It would go away. It did not. The pain did not go away. These people have NOT. GONE. AWAY! The Twitter account STILL EXISTS!!! I thought the account had been deleted, however, I was wrong and hatred breeds and multiplies and yet another account can be created in anonymity so as to further the cause of hatred.
Now here is my beef. I have no problem with someone gossiping at or about me. Whatever, sticks and stones okay. But a FULL ON CHARACTER ASSASSINATION will make this Lionesses blood boil! My sweet little guppy fish exterior will molt into the full on lion bitch I am! What else….NO ONE. I do stress NO ONE has any of this information in the blogging community…oh wait. With the single exception of my sister.
YES. You know her. Brittany Greer. Brittany Hudson Greer over @ The Greer 5.
My flesh and blood. I had attempted to try to keep this between the family. A family feud that she clearly took too far in divulging my personal information to sheer strangers for their personal use to attack me. To belittle, to judge, to bring me shame, to destroy my character, to inflict pain, I can go on and on. Clearly a reprimandable offense correct? One might think considering that a third party went so far as to assassinate my good character, to attempt to destroy my friendships, my networkings, or maybe because the cretin who created this account thought it may be funny to bring pain to someone such as me. If you believe in this…..keep on being a subscriber to your community that is “generously” run and operated by Mom Dot. Because my information seems to have been so “generously” shared and detailed…although I will state that the details in these tweets are clearly misinformed, out of time line, and clearly NONE OF ANYONE’S FUCKING BUSINESS. I also encourage you to continue to be a member of a community that does love to breed controversy as my personal life so clearly became a hot topic in a forum for enjoyment. Or hell maybe just in an email but regardless, the two involved ARE members, very active members of that community. Which further suggests that the negative behavior of public humiliation, belittling and degradation is A FUCKING OKAY with these people. I would love to publicly humiliate…man…I would be such a big girl to do that.
To post pictures of random strangers and discuss their situations may they be unfortunate with other random strangers and call it “fun” or “comedic” hell albeit fucking hysterical right…just a joke.
FUCK YOU and you know who you are. Are those tweets a fucking joke to any of you? If so….I dare you to leave me your FULL NAME to leave up for public humiliation. I also dare…..no….I challenge the lowly individual who so PROUDLY created this account with the original intentions of bashing MY friend Kristin, whether you like her or not, who then decided to turn the object of their desire to me…I CHALLENGE you to come to my blog and apologize to me. Furthermore I CHALLENGE the cretin and or CRETINS who acted in such a distasteful, vulgar, unbecoming, and plebian manner to PUBLICLY APOLOGIZE to myself and Kristin on Twitter and on a blog post that shall stay posted for AN ENTIRE WEEK. To allow those who read it to show their disdain to you. To show you how much of an uncouthful coward you were and are for hiding behind anonymity, your keyboard, and indecency. I also challenge Miss “I am the Community and this is my blog” so shoot me an email…we’ll discuss the details like adults.
Ad or Review, Sweep or Sham
The FTC has ruffled so many feathers lately among bloggers and advertisers. I find the ruckus to be rather amusing. The FTC is based on fair trade for consumers and vendors alike. My personal dealings with the FTC were brought to my attention over 10 years ago when working in the car business. You see that MSRP sticker…what we call the Maroney, is there because of the FTC. The “Buyer’s Guide” on all used cars is really a FTC disclosure that dealers were or are not implying nor stating that the vehicle you are purchasing used has any warranties implied or there within, but the vehicle is “As IS” if not otherwise stated.
Full disclosure is fun.
Now here is what is even more fun. When PR or a vendor asks for you to review their product they are basically asking for advertising, free advertising on your blog. Well I should not say FREE, because technically PR paid for the product and or “sample” to send to you for you to promote and you receive and keep said product for payment. But here is what is fun about bloggers. Some claim “cut and paste” of press releases, which is completely fine as LONG AS the press release adheres to the FTC guidelines of “deceptive, unfair advertising” [Source: FTC, 2009] and to be sure that the wording is not making specific “claims” expressed or otherwise.
Your opinion is one thing, the copy and paste….well no harm really in doing that UNLESS the press release falls into the aforementioned of “claims….deceptive and/or unfair advertising.” In which you and the advertiser will be fined. Plain and simple.
Now…..lets move past the already rehashed and regurgitated bullshit of ads, reviews, FTC, bloggers, blah blah blase and into Sweeps. Yes, giveaways, contests, swag for loot whores. We are all loot whores. Who does not want free goods. Who does not want anything free? Sweeps have been scrutinized heavily on the conduct, the integrity, the moral fiber in which they are threaded through the blogosphere and otherwise. All the rules are basically the same, Tweet, follow, comment, blah blase.
Did you know this is more than likely against the law? Yes. Just like the claim telling someone that their charitable contribution is unlawful for extra entries into a sweep, your blog sweep….MY BLOG SWEEPS are more than likely unlawful. While we are offering the “no purchase necessary” catch line, technically we are requiring people to visit our blog to enter. They have to enter that way right? Guess what…NOPE. In fact, we can offer postcards for entry. Don’t believe me….read more….then have fun bickering and creating rules amongst yourselves. Be advised….the FTC also has oversights into sweepstakes as well…..if you thought the FTC was crawling up asses before….maybe you should be more aware of your “compliance” and actually read up on the FTC, what they do, how they represent YOU, other consumers, etc.
This post has every intents and purposes to be informative.
In no way attacking, finger-pointing, accusatory, and should not be considered as such.
In no way attacking, finger-pointing, accusatory, and should not be considered as such.
Are there any rules about ads for contests or sweepstakes?
Sweepstakes-type promotions that require a purchase by participants are illegal in the United States. Other agencies, including the United States Postal Service (USPS) and the Federal Communications Commission (FCC), also enforce federal laws governing contests and prize promotions. And each state has laws that may require promoters to make disclosures, seek licensing, or post a bond. Since state laws vary, check with the Attorney General’s Office in the state(s) in which you plan to advertise. If a contest or promotion involves telephone calls, the FTC’s Telemarketing Sales Rule requires specific disclosures, such as the odds of winning a prize, how to participate without buying anything, and that no purchase or payment is required to win. If pay-per-call services are involved, the FTC’s 900 Number Rule requires certain disclosures. For more information, ask the FTC for the publications Complying with the Telemarketing Sales Rule and Complying with the 900 Number Rule. [Source: FTC, 2009]